AOL/Wire Services
Posted 4 Hours 54 Minutes Ago
Apparently the ice-skating bear had had enough
and turned on his owner, said the director
of a circus arena in Kyrgyzstan.
Dragged him across the rink and
mauled someone who tried to help.
The bear, equipped with a helmet
and trained to play hockey
(with a stick and everything!)
was dangerous & had to be shot.
I Just Want to Say
I realize I am not the first
middle-aged pseudo-intellectual
to notice this, but
our early ancestors communicated
with a series of community-understood
grunts produced by the most primitive
of vocal cords
the Egyptians used hieroglyphics
to relay information about God
and ideas and concepts that of course
today are quite outdated
ancient Greeks spoke Ancient Greek
to verbalize their lofty ideals about morality
what it means to exist and the lost continent
of Atlantis
and the Bible, well, don't get me started on
the stories they told back then about how the
entire homo sapien population came from
one man and one woman
and even when you read Shakespeare,
a guy who actually spoke English, you
can't help but think that people who claim
to admire his archaic language are lying.
Now today the kids write with that
technically-incorrect brevity that leads to
sentences like If ur going I will cu there
and this goes from their phone to someone else's
and I am not judging them because who is to say
that one day this fast-paced communication
won't be the new grammar system? It's true that
it takes less time to type gud than good
and as William Burroughs once noted,
artists are the architectures of change, not
the political legislators who
implement change after the fact.
I just want to say that the way kids
write today bugs the crap outa me. :-(
Interference from an Unwitting Species
He bought special ingredients to make
soup for his sister who was ill
but she recovered too soon
and he performed an ancient releasing
ceremony and watched them swim away.
Years later it was discovered that vicious
pointy-toothed fish were taking over the pond
devouring all the other fish and multiplying
swiftly and could live three days
without water because of a rudimentary lung
some said they could walk across land
and they became known as Fishzilla.
Man watched as Fishzilla destroyed its pond
killing smaller fish without remorse
and leaving fewer and fewer resources
so that only the biggest could survive
and then they began to turn on one another
From his great height, man plunged hooks into the pond
abducted Fishzilla and with oil of clove, sedated
the struggling, wriggling, terrified creatures
and implanted a device so that their position
could be tracked
then released them back into the pond
and watched them swim away
And you can imagine the fish stories that were told
and the other fish who refused to believe such a thing
could happen. Where is this radio transmitter?
I can't see it!
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